This is a Rebecca Taylor dress I found at a consignment shop that is no longer. I absolutely love the shade of blue and it’s super fun to dance in! It’s a really flattering cut. sometimes it doesn’t fit me, but at the moment, it does! Yay. I also wore it to my cousin Daniel’s wedding, nearly 6 years ago in Israel.
yesterday was Mother’s Day and I was lucky to spend it with my fully vaccinated family. my mother hosted at her apartment and all us kids brought something. I was able to spend some time with my nephew who closed the bedroom door “for privacy, so we can talk.” It was very cute. he turns 3 in July, a few days after I turn 38! mothers day is bittersweet for me. I have wanted to be a mother for a long time and now that I’m this age, it feels less like it will happen. I know life changes so quickly, but I’ve realized that maybe I’m not meant to be a mother and I have to accept that. If it’s God’s will then it will happen and so at this time I’m not considering freezing my eggs.
I experienced two intense romantic relationships this last year. I pictured both of them ending in marriage and kids. in fact, I was very sure about it. I didn’t feel I could leave any room for doubt or the whole picture would fall apart. But it did fall apart and I’m ok. some days feel really sad and empty and other days are full of life lessons and true beauty. I learn from others, I listen and I’m mindful. But it’s hard to relate to my siblings who are consumed by babies and weddings. I don’t think much about either of those things. my new babysitting job was cancelled because the grandmother moved in with them. I was disappointed, but I realized that some things just aren’t meant for me. I just remind myself that there’s only so much I can control. so I continue on, determined and humbled, grateful and proud. Thanks for stopping by!
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