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Writer's pictureBriyah Paley

Amazon

Wow, I’ve been so inconsistent with posting. That would frustrate me if I followed someone’s blog and had no idea when they were going to post. I’m not charging for my content, so that makes me feel a little better, but I still want to be accountable. I will keep trying! I’m going to commit to posting 2 days a week. Thinking Monday and Friday. Start of the week and end of the week. By 10am. Ahhh ok.

has anyone experienced repeatedly receiving Amazon packages that are not for them? And they aren’t things you want? No? Just me? Ok. So the woman who lived here before me isn’t the one ordering them. It’s a weird Amazon mystery. No one knows why this is happening. I want it to stop. Yesterday I opened them and it was a boat cover and hairspray. And weird back brace things. they are worth money so I don’t want to toss them, but I can’t deal with extra crap in my life. i made a friend a few weeks ago who has a consignment shop in cold spring, a very cute area. She sells second hand designer. She happened to my in my area with her car yesterday, and I gave her quite a few items! I told myself not to care about what money I make or don’t make. The fact that I got rid of stuff I don’t wear and don’t need was a big win for me. clothing was an addiction for me. It’s still hard sometimes because I get attached to things. But when I think about it, I’m getting a lot of lessons around this compulsive behavior. When I stuff my life with anything, it stops giving me a high. Every time. It has happened with travel and now it’s happened with clothes and buying useless things. It’s knowing how to take care of myself and discovering what I really need. So I feel scared, sad, lonely, tired, hungry? Then I try and deal with what’s coming up. Healing is in the feeling. Buying more dresses isn’t the answer. Having less of them is. And knowing what is worth holding on to. I’m really proud of myself for working on this. It feels awful. It’s like poking something right into the wound. But my inner child is getting peace and understanding. Of what happened to her that has carried over well into my adulthood. This is the work that can’t be avoided. This is the spiritual awakening. This is my life. I have gratitude for the gifts I’ve been given and praying for the willingness to use them in the way I was meant to.


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